Problem Patterns

“I love Problem Patterns…weird music for right now that sounds like no one else. I'm addicted” - Kathleen Hanna (Le Tigre)
“Could take their show pretty much anywhere and make a damn good fist of leaving jaws on the floor” - The Irish News
“Riotous feminist punk anthems that provide comfort and catharsis in equal measure” - Get In Her Ears
“Best band in Belfast is Problem Patterns. No flim-flam, no sell-out” - Dig With It Magazine
“Making some of the loudest and most necessary music out right now” - Bob Vylan
​“A thoroughly great racket” - Steve Lamacq, BBC Radio 6 Music
​“I just think they’re great” - Henry Rollins

Belfast-based DIY feminist queerpunk quartet PROBLEM PATTERNS are delighted to announce that their debut album Blouse Club will be released on 27th October 2023 via Alcopop! Records.

Recorded and mixed by Niall Doran at Start Together Studios in Belfast and mastered by Peter J Moore at The E Room in Toronto, the album artwork and tracklist is available to see below.

To celebrate the news, the band have returned with an anthemic new double header AA single ‘Lesbo 3000’ / ‘Poverty Tourist’, set for release on 30th August 2023.

‘Lesbo 3000’ was written by the band’s tub thumper Bethany Crooks, who can typically be found behind the Problem Patterns drum kit, but here enjoys her first foray to the front of the stage.

Commenting on the track, she says: “‘Lesbo 3000’ was written partly out of frustration and also to reclaim and have ownership over my sexuality. The frustration is that lesbianism is consistently invalidated, we’re told that we just haven’t ‘met the right man’ yet or that some random man in a bar has a magic appendage in his trousers that will completely negate your attraction to women. The reality is that homophobic attacks are becoming more and more consistent with right wing social media emboldening bigots, while ‘lesbian’ remains one of the top search topics on all porn websites. (Mostly) men think that lesbians exist for their sexual gratification, but if they see two women holding hands they go absolutely berserk.”

“I also thought it was important to reclaim the slur ‘dyke’. I’ve been called a dyke multiple times by homophobes who want to hurt me, but if I can reclaim that word it completely takes the power out of it. Yes I am a dyke. And that feels really powerful to say.”

Directed by Brendan Seamus, the video for ‘Lesbo 3000’ sees Beth joining forces with local drag artists Carl Hartt, Hester Ectomy, Xxxpresso Martini and FRUITY as her backing band.

“We really wanted it to feel joyful and silly even though the song has quite a serious subject matter,” she says of the visuals. “We decorated the set like a big gay party! We toyed for months with the idea of paying homage to ‘Addicted To Love’ and ‘Man I Feel Like A Woman’, and thought that involving local drag artists would be a perfect tonic to the constant depressing news cycles surrounding LGBTQ+ attacks and discrimination we see nowadays. Carl Hartt, Hester Ectomy, Xxxpresso Martini and FRUITY were the backing band and they all absolutely killed it. We are so grateful that they even wanted to participate in the video, and they really served 80s hair metal/bimbo/sexy punk realness.”

AA side ‘Poverty Tourist’ almost didn’t make the cut, until a Beastie Boys-style call and response between band members Ciara King and Alanah Smith, plus a killer bass line from Smith, fell into place during their final writing session before recording the album.

“We’re a working class band and there are experiences that are very unique to us which we have bonded over,” explains Smith of the track. “It’s incredibly frustrating to see those struggles co-opted by folks who have never had to worry about money. The kind of people who will dig around charity shops to ‘curate’ bits for their Etsy store where they will sell these items at 10x the price. Charity shops exist to serve the community and there are people that depend on them because there are no other options. It’s the rich kids moving into impoverished areas to make themselves sound more interesting, driving up the rent and gentrifying the area."

"This sort of romanticisation of the poor is very prevalent in the music scene, especially in bands (and industry types) who align a working class background with being perceived as more authentic. People dress up and change their accent for personal gain only, but as Jarvis Cocker once said, ‘If you called your dad he could stop this all’ - and of course, he also said, ‘Everybody hates a tourist.’ It’s cosplay, it’s gross, and it’s always obvious when someone is doing this.”

After a duo of support slots with Kathleen Hanna of Bikini Kill’s iconic electro rock trio Le Tigre earlier this year, the quartet have a London headline date at The Sebright Arms on 17th November 2023, and are midway through a run of festival appearances booked for the summer (see below for listings).

Debut album Blouse Club is released on 27th October 2023 via Alcopop! Records

More info:

Problem Patterns are four shouty queers who write songs for right now, swapping roles and instruments to get their point across about whatever angers them this week.  

After many lonely nights screaming alone in their bedrooms over the state of the world, Alanah, Bethany, Bev and Ciara (aka ABBA) came together in Belfast in 2018 to invent a new genre they called PUNK.  It's shouty, it's heavy, it's tongue in cheek, it's inclusive, it's hopeful and it's fun.

​These four DIY punk dads are all about creating havoc in celebratory and cathartic spaces.  Bigger than The Beatles, but not yet quite as big as Slipknot, the band have played notable support slots with Le Tigre, Bob Vylan and Fight Like Apes.

Their debut single, ‘Allegedly’, was recorded and released within their first month together, they released their debut EP, Good For You, Aren’t You Great? in July 2019, and their upcoming debut album BLOUSE CLUB has just been announced.

As a first taste of new material, the band unveiled the videos for singles ‘Who Do We Not Save?’—an acerbic and biting critique of Tory funding policy and their systematic attempts to privatise the NHS, and 'Letter of Resignation'—their party banger celebrating queer joy in the face of discrimination against the LGBTQ+ community.

Here's what some of their icons had to say about them:

​“I love the band Problem Patterns because they make weird music for right now that sounds like no one else and I am addicted” - Kathleen Hanna
​“I just think they’re great” - Henry Rollins
​“A thoroughly great racket” - Steve Lamacq, BBC Radio 6 Music

The band have already had a busy 2023 with support slots alongside Le Tigre, And So I Watch You From Afar and Fight Like Apes, and have even more lined up (see above for listings).